My internship !

Yes ! Its true .. I have been working ! I have been slogging my a** off . Yes sir . I have an approximately 10 hour work day with 2 hrs of travel . To think this is how my life is going to be in the future is pretty scary . I have been pretty busy people and I am tired . My blog has become rather redundant . I shall try to do something about it . Goodnight .. yaaaawn

Listen to the Exhortation of the Dawn!
Look to this Day!
For it is Life, the very Life of Life.
In its brief course lie all the
Verities and Realities of your Existence.
The Bliss of Growth,
The Glory of Action,
The Splendor of Beauty;
For Yesterday is but a Dream,
And To-morrow is only a Vision;
But To-day well lived makes
Every Yesterday a Dream of Happiness,
And every Tomorrow a Vision of Hope.
Look well therefore to this Day!
Such is the Salutation of the Dawn!

- Kalidasa

Fear

I had a dream . A dream if I may call it a dream . I know not in what dimension I exist . I know not if I do exist itself . I am lying down in a white light . A ghostly pale white light . I know not what is happening . Is this an expression of my ignorance ? Of my stupidity ? And suddenly three babies appear from above , a place I cannot see . But they are not actually babies . They just have that form . As they come closer , I wonder what ey want .And slowly , they start eating me . I cannot feel their bite . I cannot move . But they are taking something away . Something I do not want to give them , something which is inherently mine . My soul ? My ego ? And I scream . I scream for them to let go . No ! they shall not stop . They shall not stop till whatever they want is fully taken and I be left empty of that thing .

We

Yes I am a man
Yes I am one
By the time you are ready ,
I'd be done


I work real hard
At my own rate
To bring happiness
To my mate


The look on her face
When she does see
How hard I work
To make her happy


She cooks my meal
Which I greatly relish
She has made me my
Most favourite dish


We understand each other
We know we care
I love her more
Than i can dare


In my power what I can
I will do
To be with her
I know she will too


She is my own
Protect her I will
Till my very last breath
Makes me lay still.


PS : This is inspired by

Amritha's poem.

Though I started off with a different goal in mind , it generally veered , as usual ,to my blumbering , blubbering romantic inclinations .Time spent : 10 minutes . I wonder if I am in love or something these days. I dont even know what that is ... Scary !

You never always get what you want .

It is important at times to maintain a balanced attitude towards life . Sometimes you get what you want and sometimes you dont . It has to be accepted . These trivialities should not affect your balance and cool . That is a very important lesson that I have learnt . Do what you can to get the best possible result and be happy with what you get . Be balanced .

PS : I needed to write ths because it is important for me to keep my cool at this present moment and not give up something I have been working really hard for . God help me .

Aroma

It was a fine Wednesday morning . I was , as usual , sitting on my favourite park-bench and doing what I do to while away the little time I have left on this planet , observe people . I find people so alike , yet so different . It is these infinite variations I find and the fact that there is always something new , that drives me . I have always detested being staid . But when you are 70 , and are living more or less alone , you tend to get accustomed to habit . My hobby was a welcome change to my otherwise mundane life .

As I started unfolding my paper to go through what has happened in the past few hours in the world , I saw a nice smart car on the road . Nice cars are rather rare to see in this area and I was curious as to why this particular car came this way . The car was parked and out stepped a young executive with a petite young girl . I assumed that they had met quite recently and got along pretty well , as he was courteous and was trying to attend to her every need . Just like me , relationships need something new .

They entered the local baker's store . I was guessing that they were just passing by and needed some refreshments . The aroma of our bakery is another thing altogether . Some joggers have told me that they take this route sometimes to experience the smell of its fresh baked cookies . There are some feelings which we cannot describe in words . A wish , the beauty of the moon , the gentle caress of your lover and the smell of freshly baked cookies .

It is not very difficult to please a sensible woman . I believe all it takes is some interesting conversation , sweet music and respect . Life could either be simple or complicated . It is your choice , your decision . People get all worked up to achieve , to be praised , to earn and lose out on the simple niceties of life . I lost out too . But I dont regret anything now . Regret only hurts . My work has given me a decent pension to live a moderate life and the strength to be able to sit on this comfortable park bench . As I fold my newspaper and walk past the bakery store , I take deep breath . Filled with happiness unknown and a sweet feeling of ease , I make make my way back to my cottage .

Thank You !

Flowers to all my wonderful friends . Thank you for being a part of my life :) .

My Immortal - Evanescence

It is a gift to be able to add a visual plane to music which actually elevates your emotional experience . This particular song , apart from being hauntingly addictive , has a brilliantly crafted video . Call it my fascination for black and white , but the lack of colour seems to add more meaning and feeling to the video . Amy Lee's voice is really something , powerful , yet not harsh . The song also brings out the beauty of the sound of the piano . An all in all absorbing song . Do have a look at the video .

PS : Please suggest songs with a similar premise if you know any . I am a sucker for sad love songs .

Thinking and hoping ...

A small traditional house with a courtyard ,on the shores of the mighty Bay Of Bengal .He sits on the porch and smells the see breeze .As the air fills his lungs , afeeling of contentment spreads through his body .Small lights glow in the distance .Ships ,sailing off to far away lands , visiting far away places . How beautiful they looked , as they flickered in the distance , complementing the stars in the sky . The moon shone brilliantly ,dazzling any soul who laid his eyes on her . He felt a delicate touch on his shoulder and as he turned and looked at her he knew , at that moment , what paradise was . In the silence they shared , in her beautiful captivating eyes , that hint of a smile on her face ,her dark long hair ,he lost himself as tears of joy flowed down his cheek and in that moment , he experienced true bliss .

1+2+3+3+2+1

After almost two weeks of hectic quizzes , I am back !! This occured in class . After my B slot( Digital Signal Processing ) Quiz , we were sitting sitting in class and the all charismatic Ramlingam Sir started to discuss the solutions .

First question(by ramli) : How did you do your exams ?

Class : *Gen chatter* People are happy exam was easy


I thought I had done pretty well in my exam and as usual , was sitting in the first bench . As sir solved some problem on board , I was nodding my head as I 'thought' i had done that sum right . Then suddenly , I find Ramli Sir looking at me . He had probably seen me nodding my head .there was a tinge of amusement and sarcasm on his face as he started to nod his head the other way !!
I was totally confused now .. I had done that problem perfeclty right . I had put down the same steps . What is going on ? Ramli sir clearly notices the confusion in my face .

The last step to the solution was 1+2+3+3+2+1 = 12 .

He calmly turns around , writes a 9 and points his finger at me mockingly . ' Why did you not not use your calculator ? ' as the whole class bursts into laughter !

I have not been more embarassed than this ever ! Man , does life rock !!

The BEST page in the universe !! { Link }

Do NOT click on this link unless you have atleast an hour of free time , 'cos I can assure you that you'll be hooked .

CLICK HERE :)

PS) Maddox rules !!!

I rule !!!

I won the Creative Writing - Day 4 ( Titbits ) event at Saarang 2006 . Am I good or what !
Numero Uno baby !! Yay !!

Coming up soon : My Creative Writing - Day 3 ( Poetry ) entry at Saarang 2006 .

My Creative Writing entry

Saarang is here and there are lots of girls and lots of noise and lots of wannabes and i just sometimes laugh at them ... hrrrmph . I am pretty irritated with it this time .. i do not know for what reason . Damn it .. Anyway , one of the main motivations for me to take part in the Creative Writing competition this time was the fact that i could post it all in my blog . Sounded like a good idea at that time ... *sigh* .


The Question : ACP Rathod is woken up at the middle of the night and informed about a dead body found in a deserted street . It is that of a woman and the only thing found along with her is a handbag with a note which says ' Do not exceed your welcome ' . Her left ring finger has been cut-off . Improvise .


My Answer :


The first time i saw him , I remember being filled with a strange kind of dread . You experience some feelings rarely and it is often these feelings that you do not forget . As I slump down to the floor in ACP Rathod's office ,I recall the events that lead to his tragic fate. It rains and thunders outside as his motionless silhouette sits by the window .

I was assigned to ACP Rathod about a month ago. He was one of the most brilliant officers ever to be on the force . He had single handedly cracked many ' unsolvables ' . I must say for myself that I was not bad either and the more I got to know him , the more i respected him . But ACP Rathod was a troubled man . He never drank and never smoked . He told me one day , ' I will never smoke because a rational man would not knowingly destroy his precious irreplaceable organs . I will never drink because I am trying damn hard to control my mind. I would not dare to let it loose. I fear its power . '

It was a night , three days ago , when he walked into the bar I frequent . I was surprised at that time but welcomed his company . He had a problem he said , as he drank his brandy .
I discovered that day , what a troubled man ACP Rathod was . His wife left him a year ago and had taken the only thing in his life which was more precious to him than his work , his daughter . He was 35 years old , single and confused but always extremely meticulous with his work . He never smiled and always looked stressed out . But he did not tell me what his problem was that day and I let it go at that . Some people just need somebody to talk to sometimes .


I was woken up at midnight by a call from my boss. He had recieved news of the dead body of a woman lying in a deserted part of the street .

12:20 AM : I reach the office and find that the light in Mr.Rathod's room is on . I grab a cup of coffee from the coffee machine to get my mind working and climb the stairs to his room . I see him twirling a pen in his hand in a characteristic fashion and trying to work out something on his pad.

12:30 AM : We reach the crime scene to find the body of a well dressed woman , about the age of 25. She had been strangled to death and her left ring finger had been cut-off . The police were already there on the scene before us , and had found a piece of paper in her handbag which said ' do not exceed your welcome ' .

01:00 AM : After convincing myself that there were no other clues around , I look around for Mr. Rathod. He was sitting on the other corner of the street and it looked like he had found something. It was a handkerchief and had a name ' Woody ' stitched on it and there were marks of blood . He had found the severed finger wrapped in it.
I remembered to have seen that name somewhere , but i was unable to place it . But what was more intriguing was the look on his face . He looked like he was about to cry , anguish and pain and uncertainty . Then , as he saw me next to him , his expression immediately changed to his usual frown .

01:20 AM : We leave the scene and bid each other goodbye . I go back to my room and feel very uncomfortable . I had seen the name Woody written somewhere. As i am unable to sleep , i get up to wash my face . As the cold water splattered on my face , I just remembered where i had seen it ! Mr. Rathod had written a poem and had shown it me

In heavens arms shall I sleep
For peace this world does not bring
To you , I need to come
Lord , execute me once

and it had been signed Woody !!!!


02:40 AM : I run like a madman to his office . I do not know what has taken me over . It was a feeling of something bad about to happen , something terrible . My gut feeling was never wrong and i ran . I ran to him . I ran because i did not know what else to do . And just as I was about to enter the building , I heard a loud BANG ! A gunshot ! The sound made me freeze on the spot.

0300 AM : I slowly climb the stairs and enter his room , my gun drawn to find him dead on his desk , gun in hand . He had blown his brains out . I was flabbergasted and did not know what to do . I found his scribbling pad in which the following had been scribbled .


DO NOT EXCEED YOUR WELCOME

LORD EXECUTE ME ONCE , WOODY


It was an anagram !!!!

The next day morning , I find out that the woman who had been killed was his wife . His kid had been killed in a car accident while playing outside her house and her mother was on the phone four days ago. That night at the bar , he had taken a few drinks and in a fit of insanity ,driven over to her place and killed her . He had been so taken over by rage that only after seeing her dead body ,three days later did he realise what he had done . She had taken away from him the only thing that mattered . As Red says in the Shawshank Redemption , " Every man has his breaking point " , and this was his .


PS : Junta , sorry if this leaves you a bit pained :) But this was written in 3 hours time , the first one hour of which went into figuring out the anagram .

Heil Karmalkar !!!

If there was one thing I was not satisfied with in IIT , it was the teaching. Many of the 'profs' seemed to look upon teaching as a burden . Then entered the charming , handsome stud Device Modelling prof Dr Shreepad Karmalkar . Its a pleasure listening to him and he is the perfect ' model ' of what a prof should be . Some of his gems ...

' Life is just a set of iterations. You try something out , check if it works , and then iterate to get something better'

'Modelling is like a game of chess . Just knowing how each piece moves does not ensure that you can win the game. You slowly develop expertise and improve your game. '

'What is understanding ? Understanding is knowing what is important and what you can ignore to simplify your problem. '

------

Sometimes , it feels like prison to me . Only there are no walls , no bars , no offence . You are free , they say . You are free to do what you please .... But are you ? I think man likes to be bound . The second they say you are free , he starts tying himself up with his own ropes . He starts limiting his possibilities ,he starts becoming un-free . Life throws many things at us .. But the cruellest thing is time . No matter how happy and how well fit , there is always this doubt ... ' could it have been done better ? Why did I Not do that ? Oh God wish I could go back . ' Any intelligent person would definitely have thought that , some time or the other . So I beg myself to live now .... to DO now ... because later I should not regret not having done it well , or not having done it at all ...

Inescapabilities

I fall again into my mind
As i spiral down , down into its depths
Purity i seek and that i do not get
Bored as I am to climb the steps

Indiscreet enquiry fails to make sense
As i move closer to self-destruction
Unbearably numb , numb as i am dumb
I throw the key into my own abyss

No people , no comfort ,no crying
As I just want to sleep
A sweet lullaby is sung to me
when I am done , I shall sleep.

Nice Beginning

Nothing like Home ... No place ever . After a six day sojourn at my 'favouritest' place in the whole universe , my home in Hyderabad , I am back in IIT , refreshed and ready to take on the new semester . My mum, like always , pampered me as much as she could . A cool fireworks display at midnight , thanks to some rich dude who lives near my place , the beautiful view of the lighted overbridge which still makes me want to stare at it and admire it , a child's innocent thankful smile in the train which made my heart beat faster and jump and soar with joy , boy i had a great time .
While leaving Hyderabad , the moon played its part by smiling ever so gently ... just a hint of a smile , a thin line in the sky ... WOW what a sight it was and what a great beginning !!!!

Sad Movies (as in sad the opposite of happy)

I like movies which end on a sad note . They somehow seem to be more realistic and convincing . Agreed that people come to watch a movie to have a nice time . Its a break that they want from their mundane and not so fair ,reality . It takes them away from their own lives and into one of joy and happiness . But somehow , sad ends move you in a strange way . Could you please suggest some good ones ?

Apple i-tunes : I love it !!!

As the tones of the piano waft through the air , I am transported to a magical world where nothing and everything co-exist in perfect harmony . I close my eyes and am happy to have the privilege of listening to a beautiful concert right here in my room , lying on my bed . Its raining outside ... well since my present self resides in Chennai , it would be new if I said that it wasn't raining . But that apart, I was able to experience this classical pleasure thanks to Internet Radio on the Apple i-tunes player.I am majorly impressed by what they have offered to date and the good thing is
that it is legitimate and freeeee . Check it out !

Click here to download Apple i-tunes player :

i-tunes by Apple

PS : Please comment ppl . It makes me very happy :) :)

What should I do with my life ? { link }

This link is brilliantly written . Check it out .

LIFE